October 12, 2011

Expired Office Foods and Passwords

On a typical day, I bring an banana (yes, I know it’s supposed to be “a” but “an banana” sounds better) and an orange to work. So I have two snacks, one for the morning and one for the afternoon. It’s great, nice sugar rush for 0 points.

But we ran out of oranges at home, so I only had the banana yesterday, so I enjoyed that in the morning with peanut butter. Come afternoon, I was SO VERY HUNGRY. Ravenous. And I couldn’t think, for want of food. I wasn’t actually hungry but my mind knew it was snack time so it was all I could concentrate on. I didn’t want to raid the candy bowl as I’ve been a Fatty McButterpants lately and going downstairs to get food – OMG choices, no thank you. So I raided my closet. And I found an expired granola bar. And let me tell you, it was bliss.

In the course of yesterday’s raid, I found a serving of chocolate pudding. Hiding behind plastic bags or some business (really, I should clean the closet out). I have no idea how long it was there but I was holding on to it for the future. Like today, after I had my lunch, I really wanted sugar but didn’t feel like making tea (w/Splenda, of course, let’s keep the unlimited 0 points rolling over here) so I found that pudding and it was MINE. It was so perfect and delicious and God bless preservatives.

That pudding was meant to be found, I tells ya, cuz I read the expiration date and it said enjoy until October 28, 2011. Which is almost 2 weeks from now. Is that fate or what? I was divinely guided to that pudding. Yummmmmm…..puddddding =). Which, by the way, reminds me of the stoopid “pudding face” ads in train stations. They’re creepy as anything. Huge, gory, stretched out smiles on people’s faces, ugh. No thank you.

I don’t know what I’ll do for a snack this afternoon but I did find oatmeal in my closet a few weeks ago and that’s still there. Maybe I’ll have oatmeal. It’s good to know I’m eating my “emergency” food during non-emergency events. Excellent survival skills.

With all this exciting hunting for food in the office business going on, it’s easy to see why I keep forgetting that I recently was forced to change my password at work. UGH. I ABHOR changing passwords. They’re required by the company every something-or-other days. SO ANNOYING. Every single password cycle, I’m always on the verge of locking myself out of my machine. Stoopid policy. Yes, of course, it makes sense, but it’s SO SUPER ANNOYING.

The end.


September 26, 2011

Purple Fatty McButterpants

Filed under: Clothes,Fatty McButterpants,rambling,Weigh In — hijabeng @ 5:16 pm

Hey yo, happy Monday. Yeah, I know, eyeroll. What, you also had the Sunday night insomnia? Gosh, we’re such twins.

Sooooo I weighed in on Saturday. Gained another pound to add to the 0.8 I gained the week before. I’m officially 159.8 and THIS IS NOT OK. I was at 151.4, what the deal? Grrrrr. It might have something to do with the fact that I consume 50 points a day, as opposed to the 29+7 that I’m allowed. Sigh. Food.

Just to compound the feelings of The Fat, I put on a suit today because I needed to look like a grownup. A suit I had no business buying but optimistically purchased five pounds ago. And my, how those five pounds have enhanced my food baby, which now proudly juts over the pants. Also, this lovely new suit, which is olive, by the way, has totally reinforced my earlier opinion that lined pants are the devil. Cuz your body needs to BREATHE. My lower body is feeling suffocated. I could just imagine my legs gasping for air. Why, oh why are you suffocating us, they plead.

But the olive suit is too beautiful and I checked with my closet for compatibility before deciding to keep it. Today, I’m wearing it with a beautiful purple sheath dress for Target and a purple hijab. And purple heels =). Perhaps I’m a little too matchy today but sometimes, you need a pair of heels  you haven’t worn in a year to get you through the Monday. And realize that, dang, you haven’t worn 3″ heels while commuting in a whiiiiile. Such is life, shrug.

I’m considering a clothing experiment. Pick one item and wear it once a week indefinitely. The item I’m considering is a blue sheath dress that I always want to wear but think that I can’t recycle to often. But it’s a navy blue sheath, that’s pretty neutral, right? Especially with the bajillion shirts I plan on wearing it with. Ok, you convinced me, I’m gonna do this. Maybe it’ll be like Navy Thursdays or something. Or Navy Wednesday, for alliteration’s sake. Decisions, decisions.

September 20, 2011

Tip of the Day: Groceries for Work

Tip: If you know you’re going to be a starving beastmonster, then please, prepare for your monstrous appetite from home. It’s great that you grabbed that spare jar of peanut butter and your sister’s lunch on your way out but at 5 points for 2 tbsp of peanut butter, that’s a lotta points! Put that spoon away, consider the candy bowl haram and start adding fiber to your diet, you moron. Ugh.

So, I shall grab some part-skim mozzarella string cheese, a bunch of greek yogurts, light cranberry juice, and wasa crackers to add to my at-work arsenal, as well as some type of milk, to hold me over when I don’t bring enough fruit in. Typically, I bring a banana and an orange to work but sometimes, I only have one or the other. I should bring oatmeal, too. And eat more veggies. I should also actually *do* these things instead of blogging about them.

Note to self: Do Things. Get Ish Done.

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