hijabeng

September 29, 2011

Love Is

Filed under: family,Love — hijabeng @ 5:00 pm
Tags: , , , , ,

Love is when you leave work early, spending all the comp time you earned, to go get a vaccine. It’s when you stand in the middle of a busy street, waiting for your mother to pick you up from the doctor’s office because you’re on her way home from work.

Love is when you’re proud of your mom for quitting her job, even when she doesn’t understand what retirement is. And hearing about how her workplace refused to accept her resignation.

Love is when you agree to go to the supermarket on your drive home even though you’re exhausted. And it is love when your mom lets you sit in the car while she picks up a few things.

Love is when you’re just so tired but you start peeling the mangoes because your mom wanted some. So you get off the couch, grab the cutting board and a few mangoes and start peeling them with a potato peeler, sitting next to your mom while she eats rice with a snowpea-and-potato-bhaji.

Love is when you’re happy that you bought a new potato peeler that works so well on mangoes and the food your mom is eating smells really good.

Love is when you say, “Mom, that smells good,” and she feeds you a bite with her own hand. And then she alternates bites of rice with the almost caramelized snowpea-and-potato-bhaji between you and herself until it’s all gone.

Love is when you’re sad that the mangoes were all black inside but you package them all up to return to the store.

Love is when she feeds you the last bite of her meal and you say, “Mom, that was amazing. I wish  you would feed me some more.”

Love is when your mother doesn’t smack you, her 26-year-old daughter, for saying such ridiculous things. And then plates some rice and bhaji for you to eat because she knows you’re hungry.

September 28, 2011

Bag Epiphany

Filed under: rambling — hijabeng @ 7:45 pm
Tags: , , ,

Who woulda thunk that carrying a beat-up Jansport with a yoga mat and wallet would be sooooo much lighter than carrying a leather bag with three wallets? Who woulda thunk, indeed.

September 27, 2011

Some Terrible Things

It’s time for a list again, because I like them. Today’s list will be on terrible things.

  1. I wore the same pants two days in a row. And not black pants that nobody would notice you repeating anyway. These are the precious olive pants from my suit that I wore yesterday. My preshussssss. They went too beautifully with a tan kameez with mauve and goldenrod floral print that I just HAD to wear them again. TODAY. Lined pants are still terrible. But pretttttyyyy.
  2. I really cannot focus at work. Or at home. But on the internet, I am a flipping PRO. Too bad that my life doesn’t involve me getting paid and praised for surfing the nets. Too bad. I’ll go cry a river except it would make my face puffier.
  3. Nasal spray is my bestie, for serious. My allergies have gotten so terrible this year (thank you Hurricane Irene), that I now need two nasal sprays. TWO. And one is a STEROID. But I have been slacking off so today, I woke up with a puffy face due to inflamed sinuses that eventually reached to making my eyes swell. So no contacts today. Nerd glasses for the win.
  4. I am excellent at writing letters and emails. Seriously, I am the boss of them. Every letter or email I write is perfection (except for the random missing preposition or letter but who cares). They’re clear, succinct, direct and inoffensive, even when I’m insulting or denying someone. But I just HATE writing them. So, as a minor tip within a list, do not ever let anyone know that you’re good at something you hate. Otherwise, your workload may consist of nothing but emails. EMAILS. UGH.
  5. Why can’t engineers write? People, we all went to school. You can’t coast on your math skills for lyfe. Man up, people.
  6. Wearing 3″ heels for 15 hours straight yesterday was NOT a smart move. Especially since I hadn’t done that in months. I need to ease my knees into that level of patella-dislocating-pain. I should have known better. I could actually feel the uncomfortable sliding of my kneecap while standing or walking. I do these things because I am just emitting pure genius over here. But those purple heels are my lovelies and the stacked heels were comfortable, creepy shifting kneecaps or no. Although, by the end of the night, the balls of my feet were dying but they’re okay today.
  7. I am steadily plowing through my jar of peanut butter at work. It’s the perfect snack – salty and sweet and filling. But when my coworkers find me with a purple or yellow disposal spoon in my mouth every day, that’s really not a professional snack, you know? Also, I’m eating too much peanut butter.
  8. Which reminds me, my lactose-intolerant sister can’t have any of the ghetto alfredo sauce I make (which I’ll get around to posting, eventually) but it occurred to me in a brilliant flash of intuition that I can probably make a peanut butter sauce with soy milk for her pasta. This is beginning to sound yummy. But, this is still terrible because I haven’t made it yet. See? Still fitting with the overall theme.
  9. I found out this morning that my mom has no idea what a 401k is for. She contributed to it nominally but didn’t realize how important it was. She thought that she was going to get at least $1k to $1.5k per month from Social Security. I don’t know where she got this idea from, at all. This is truly terrifying and explains why I am so financially illiterate. When I asked her what did she comprehend from the news saying that Social Security is going implode by 2014 (or whatever the latest prediction is, who knows), she said that she paid into Social Security, so she’s going to get it back. Then she mentioned her pension. Which doesn’t exist. Because she’s not a public employee. Facepalm. I need to have a serious talk with my parents about their future and the sibs on how to support our parents in the future.

Heavy thoughts today, heavy thoughts indeed.

September 26, 2011

Purple Fatty McButterpants

Filed under: Clothes,Fatty McButterpants,rambling,Weigh In — hijabeng @ 5:16 pm

Hey yo, happy Monday. Yeah, I know, eyeroll. What, you also had the Sunday night insomnia? Gosh, we’re such twins.

Sooooo I weighed in on Saturday. Gained another pound to add to the 0.8 I gained the week before. I’m officially 159.8 and THIS IS NOT OK. I was at 151.4, what the deal? Grrrrr. It might have something to do with the fact that I consume 50 points a day, as opposed to the 29+7 that I’m allowed. Sigh. Food.

Just to compound the feelings of The Fat, I put on a suit today because I needed to look like a grownup. A suit I had no business buying but optimistically purchased five pounds ago. And my, how those five pounds have enhanced my food baby, which now proudly juts over the pants. Also, this lovely new suit, which is olive, by the way, has totally reinforced my earlier opinion that lined pants are the devil. Cuz your body needs to BREATHE. My lower body is feeling suffocated. I could just imagine my legs gasping for air. Why, oh why are you suffocating us, they plead.

But the olive suit is too beautiful and I checked with my closet for compatibility before deciding to keep it. Today, I’m wearing it with a beautiful purple sheath dress for Target and a purple hijab. And purple heels =). Perhaps I’m a little too matchy today but sometimes, you need a pair of heels  you haven’t worn in a year to get you through the Monday. And realize that, dang, you haven’t worn 3″ heels while commuting in a whiiiiile. Such is life, shrug.

I’m considering a clothing experiment. Pick one item and wear it once a week indefinitely. The item I’m considering is a blue sheath dress that I always want to wear but think that I can’t recycle to often. But it’s a navy blue sheath, that’s pretty neutral, right? Especially with the bajillion shirts I plan on wearing it with. Ok, you convinced me, I’m gonna do this. Maybe it’ll be like Navy Thursdays or something. Or Navy Wednesday, for alliteration’s sake. Decisions, decisions.

September 21, 2011

I’m a Weirdo

Je ne sais pas, but I definitely have a certain je ne sais quoi. Actually, I could write that whole sentence in French, cuz I’m cool like that. Je ne sais pas mais j’ai un certain je ne sais quoi. Or something like that, high school was a long time ago.

Back to the point, there is just something about me that attracts strange ones like children to ice cream trucks. Maybe I smell like ice cream? I don’t know. But there you have it, I smell like ice cream and my coworkers come up to me randomly throughout the day just to talk. About nothing. While interrupting me and others.

Example Un: A coworker gave me a rock. Yes, a rock. It’s currently keeping a napkin, gum, and white-out company on my desk and occassionally hinders my computer mouse. I don’t know why he gave it to me, he just offered it to me and I didn’t know how to say, “Uh, why exactly are you giving me a rock?” without sounding like a 6itch. He also collects rocks, off beaches and parks and buys them from rock stores. Yes, there are stores apparently where you can go for the sole purpose of buying a rock. And I’m not talking about a souvenir shop where rocks are a side attraction so that parents will be forced to waste money on their kids. Rock. Store. Yes.

Example Deux: Another coworker stopped by to tell me that he problems with his iPhone. Why he thought I would care is beyond me, as I, nor anyone in my family own an iPhone. Or iPod. Or iPad. Or iMac or any sort of iThing whatsoever. And he wasn’t on his way to talk to anyone either, just came to my desk and talked about his issue. And then left. Like, whaaaaaaa?

After the case of Example Deux, I bugged my cubicle neighbor and asked, exactly what is it about me that invites these people? I told him to be honest cuz I just.don’t.get.it. Like whyyyyyyyyyyy. At one point in my career, people used to stop by my desk and talk to me for so long that my supervisors actually spoke to me about it. It actually interfered with my workload! And the offenders were spoken to as well! He said that some people have that something that just draws people in. He doesn’t know what it is, exactly, but it is apparently observable in the 3rd person. Others have mentioned this to me as well. And I’m considered *nice*. And that I have to learn how to be mean to people at work. Oy vey.

And that’s just the dangest thing ever, because I used to have such a hard time in school with friends. People were scared of me and some actually really did not like me because I was loud, blunt and rude. After a while, when they got to know me, they’d say, “Oh, that’s just HijabEng, that’s just the way she is. Once you get to know her, you’ll love her. I used to hate her when I first met her, too.” Ha, that just reminded me that my best friend ever actually hated my guts when we first met. Ha, both of my best friends. Too funny.

And it’s true, I am loud, blunt and rude. I tell it how I see it, no filter, no way, no how. Shrug. I suppose in a floor of engineers, maybe I am nice? It’s prolly cuz I have a higher pitched voice. I should work on having a permanent cold to maintain my sexay-man-voice. Next project, perhaps.

September 20, 2011

Tip of the Day: Groceries for Work

Tip: If you know you’re going to be a starving beastmonster, then please, prepare for your monstrous appetite from home. It’s great that you grabbed that spare jar of peanut butter and your sister’s lunch on your way out but at 5 points for 2 tbsp of peanut butter, that’s a lotta points! Put that spoon away, consider the candy bowl haram and start adding fiber to your diet, you moron. Ugh.

So, I shall grab some part-skim mozzarella string cheese, a bunch of greek yogurts, light cranberry juice, and wasa crackers to add to my at-work arsenal, as well as some type of milk, to hold me over when I don’t bring enough fruit in. Typically, I bring a banana and an orange to work but sometimes, I only have one or the other. I should bring oatmeal, too. And eat more veggies. I should also actually *do* these things instead of blogging about them.

Note to self: Do Things. Get Ish Done.

September 16, 2011

Quick WW Update

Filed under: Weigh In — hijabeng @ 8:07 am
Tags: , ,

Dudes, how did I forget to tell you about this week? I went up 0.8 lbs!!!!!!!!!!! Soooooo TERRIBLE.

Reasons for my total inability to lose weight:

  1. Not tracking. Because I’m a goose-head, no insult to goooses intended. Ummm, geese. Anyway, start tracking!!!!!
  2. Lattes. Frappes. Desserts. I allowed myself these goodies during Ramadan for the quick pick-me-up and apparently, I continue to think they’re ok. They’re NOT. And my stomach gets really angry with milk – blessing of Ramadan: after eliminating most food for a month, slowly reintroducing stuff forces you to realize what food sensitivies you have. Joy. Stop eating the sweeties, fattie.
  3. Confused by body signals. Sometimes I think I’m hungry so I’ll eat but I’m really not hungry. Sometimes, I’m just thirsty. Or I have a bad taste in my mouth. I got so used to denying all hunger pangs that now, I’m confused by them since I can eat throughout the day. If I remember being hungry, I eat. Terrible.

So, I need to work at this whole WW thing because I’m paying $39/month for the privilege of regaining weight I’ve released. Uh, no, not acceptable. That’s $468/year!!!! Gotta do better, cuz I’m just being ridic here.

September 15, 2011

I Wear Gym Socks with Heels

Yes, yes I indeed do. Strange, isn’t it, in a world where women debate as to whether trouser socks are appropriate with heels or flats (and why wouldn’t they be), I wear straight up thick gym socks, with my heels, and not for stretching out the shoes.

Why? Because, while I hate wearing socks, I hate the feel of shoes against my bare feet. And I had to go to the field earlier this week, so I had to be in sneakers part of the day, too. So I had to compromise somewhere, I wasn’t about to wear trouser socks with sneakers. My foot would just get slick and weird from sweating too much with the trouser sock/sneaker combo. Uh, no thanks.

So, I’m sure you’re asking, what on earth did she wear to the office that day, with her whole gym socks, sneakers and heels situation? What outfit could possibly be ok with all that jazz going on? Well, if you weren’t wondering, I’m sure you are now. I wore a simple tunic top, or kameez, with wide-legged black pants. Black sneakers for commuting (which I should review one day, I looooovvve my commuting sneakers) and switched to black pumps in the office. A kameez with dress pants is a typical in-the-office workday outfit for me, which I wouldn’t ordinarily wear to the field but I knew I was going to be in the car the entire time. If walking around a site were required, I might have worn pants I cared less about, perhaps.

I was going to take a photo of this awesomeness but I forgot, I shall have to recreate the scenario for you. Just imagine, black gym socks turned gray from repeated washing, stuffed into sleek black heels with tapered square toe box and stacked 3″ heels. Yummy, I know. Try not to choke on the jealous ;).

September 12, 2011

I Accidentally Lit a Napkin on Fire

Filed under: I'm a Weirdo,rambling,Work — hijabeng @ 1:00 pm
Tags: , , ,

Or, Toaster Ovens are Dangerous. Dangerousssssss.

So my mommy made me a breakfast sandwich this morning (be jealousss, haterz) and I brought it to work with me, since I didn’t feel consuming the egg-in-a-bagel while commuting. We have a toaster oven at the office, so I just popped it in there while I continued on to my desk, signed in and did some randomness at my desk. I return to my sandwich and I’m faced with a dilemma – sandwich is too hot for me to retrieve. So I stick my napkin in there to grab my sandwich. And napkin ignites. IGNITES!!!!

A piece of napkin broke off and continues to dance in flames while the flaming napkin in my hand quickly gets tossed in the sink, and gets drowned posthaste. The in-toaster-oven napkin burns itself to death and I patiently use another napkin to grab my sandwich. This time, it only gets charred and I was off to enjoy my delicious sandwich. Thankfully, the silly exploding napkin didn’t ignite my sandwich. That would have seriously made me sadface.

Moral of the story: I’m a hazard. The end.

September 6, 2011

The Worst Part of the Workday: Choosing What to Wear to Work

Filed under: Clothes,Hijabi Issues,rambling,Weigh In — hijabeng @ 6:10 pm
Tags: , , ,

Salam y’all, hope you all enjoyed your holiday weekends (well, in the US at least). I had a fabulous time cooking, eating, sleeping, and spending wayyyyy too much time online and on Netflix. I suppose I could have blogged but I didn’t. Whoops. C’est la vie ;).

Anyways, I hope you’re ready to read a looonnng post, because I’m in a rambling kinda mood (when am I not?) and I have the Adele station on Pandora going and life is good and I’m finally awake, which always occurs after 1pm. I would be a much more productive employee if I could start after noon. Whatevs. Also, I like how I can never stick to the title of my post. I guess my blog is more potluck than anything? Philosophizing, food, dating (which I promised, just trying to gather the mental strength to write about that aspect of my life) and now fashion. Really, my dear readers, this blog is so ME. If you were to read all of what I wrote, you would understand me better than most of my friends do.

From my blogroll, I think it’s no secret that I LOOOOOOOVVVVE, love love love fashion blogs. And clothes. And shoes. And just pretty things in general (note to self: find a cupcake blog to obsess over). Also, I love purses (note to self: add purse blog that you like). While it may seem superficial, clothes are extremely important. Clothes are *the* primary method of how you present yourself without saying a word. Someone looking at you judges you based on what you wear, whether you like it or hate it. Of course, posture, body shape and size and other features are all there but I’m most addressing the things *you* choose. And for a Muslim woman trying to dress modestly – clothes are a double/triply/infinity edged sword, if that makes any sense. And as an engineer, I need to look beyond the aesthetics of clothing, the function is sometimes more important than how awesome it looks (or not).

So every morning, I wake up and argue with myself: do I want to look cute? Do I look modest? Do I have to go to the field? Are my clothes professional enough for the office? Can I be seen after work dressing like this? Am I going to the mosque during lunch or after work? Whoa, that’s at least 6 edges right there. And that’s before I even start thinking about makeup. It sure ain’t easy, trying to satisfy personal, religious, professional and practical aspects of dressing simultaneously. I was going to address these all in one post but I think I’ll save that for another post.

And just for funsies, I lost 0.4 lbs this week! Secrets: eating ice cream every day, eat cookies and constantly snack throughout the day without having any real meals. I’m sure this is going to backfire for me eventually but adjusting to eating all day is TOUGH!!!!

So not as long a post as I had intended but I’m a little tired of writing. Also, I just wanted to share that as much as I didn’t want to roll out of bed after the holiday weekend, my socks match my dress and every time I look at my feet, it makes me smile =).

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